Procrastination

Procrastination is an ugly little habit many writers deal with in their careers.  

And yes, I do believe it is a habit; which means that ultimately the pattern of waiting until the last minute to finish something or never doing it at all can be broken. 

I have warring tendencies in my nature that a) want to plan everything out and be prepared for every scenario possible in as many areas of my life as I can and b) wants to put everything off until...well, forever really.  It's really quite confusing and a bit embarrassing that I seem to be a walking contradiction of myself.    

It depends on the activity of course that determines how much procrastination takes hold.  

If I ever feel as though I HAVE to do whatever it is, the more likely I will put it off until the last possible moment.  If, of course, it is an extra curricular activity that I really WANT to do, it gets done first, and then I regret having finished it so quickly and not taking my time to savor the moment.  

Three weeks ago, I volunteered to submit a piece for my writer's group for critique.  Since I began, no one has gone twice, and I submitted my first time somewhere in the middle of the pack.  I volunteered because our numbers have dwindled a bit during the summer months and no one else was willing to put their hat in the ring.  So I thought "this is great," we're skipping the weekend we would normally meet due to the 4th of July weekend and I'll have an extra week to really have a stellar submission - really knock their socks off."

Oh, you think I would know myself by now...

I had so much time to do everything right and you know what happened?  I had a recovering puppy with his hurt leg and vet appointments, family in town, brand new job, 4th of July plans, helped paint my friend's condo, read a couple of books, worked on our house reconstruction, our 3 year anniversary, birthday parties, copywriting for the new job...

A WHOLE LIST of things I either had to do or that took the place of sitting down and working on my critique submission.  

Was there time in the midst of all of this to write?  Of course there was.  And what did I do?  Write a little, but not focusing on the task at hand. 

I had initially set out to finish this book, get an agent and get a publisher all before the end of the 2009 calendar year.  A goal that I think I should still shoot for (so I have a deadline), but one that I am quickly beginning to realize is almost a laughable feat.  Can it be done?  Sure!  Can I do it is an entirely different question.  One that we will just have to see about. 

So - that is what I'm struggling with currently.  And it seems that when I air out my difficulties, it motivates me through shame and the fear of failure to actually turn myself around.  So here goes nothing - I hope this works!  

Here's my current situation:  

I am hovering at right around 52,000 words at the moment.  My goal is to reach around 90,000 words in my rough draft and then whatever the final word count is, I'm fine with.  

To finish the rough draft alone in 2009, I need to be writing around 2,000 words a week.  

That's 400 new words a day, if I write 5 days out of the 7.  That's totally doable, right??  I think I can do it.  But that's just the rough draft.  Polishing the book is going to take a significant amount of time and stick-to-it-iv-ness, as my Mom would say.  

Okay.  That's enough of that for now.  

Here's some other life-updates: 

Axle doing his silly "Pooh-bear sit"

-Axle is healing quickly and doing really well.  Matt and I took him to the vet today to get his stitches out and the surgeon who performed the surgery praised him on how well he was doing. 

-My new job is as a Brand Manager with a company called Brand Iron.  You can check out what we do here:  www.brandiron.net

-Matt is working almost every night on the house and it's slowly getting done.  The downstairs bath is almost complete (minus the baseboards, crown moulding and the mirror).  We've taken inspiration from a photo my sister-in-law took while she and my brother were in Greece.  It looks great.  I am so proud of Matt and can't wait to share some pics of it when it's complete.  Our house is going to look amazing.    

Pistol, in a reusable grocery bag

-Our youngest pet, a 2 year old short haired tiger striped tabby named Pistol was picked up by a hawk this week.  I was outside clipping the hedges when she spontaneously fell from the sky.  Matt saw her land in an area that was not exactly a normal place for her to fall from (no trees overhead).  The hawk glided up into a nearby tree to wait as she scampered off into the bushes.  The hawk glided off his perch and headed straight for Matt, or so it seemed:  Ty (our 4 year old cat) was in the grass behind him.  

If the bird thought he could pick him up, he is crazy, or really really hungry; either of which is not really a good combination for our cats.  

Pistol and Ty are both fine, surprisingly healthy, but pretty resentful about being confined to the inside of the house for now.  Their cries for freedom are pretty pitiful and hard to ignore.     

 

 -My older brother passed his P.E. exam (Professional Engineer) on the first try.  I guess only 50% of the applicants who take the test make it on the first time around, so we're really proud of him.  Congratulations B!  

-His son, (my nephew) is walking now - scratch that, running.  He's keeping his mommy and daddy on their toes for sure.  I hear that he has forgotten that he still needs to go down the stairs a bit lower to the ground and that he's feeling so confident in his new skill that he's fallen twice now.  Isn't that how we learn?  I imagine he'll be talking soon.  But, if he's anything like his dad, he'll only speak when there's something really worth saying.  And that's okay.  It's just fun (for a chatter box like me) to watch him grow and await the day when he can communicate exactly what he means with words.  

If you're still reading this, and you have a moment, please feel free to take my little poll about the book.  I think that this will really help (when this eventually becomes more of a blog about writing and my book).  

Thanks!  

L

 

Update: Axle is healing, Tanner is ONE and our granite

Here's a short update on a couple of things:  

Puppy got his stitches out today!  2 weeks post-op.  He is lookin' good!  (This photo was taken the first day after surgery - so the swelling and bruising has gone down.)  He's so strong now, it's difficult keeping him from pulling on his leash.  

Tanner is ONE year old!  Here he is on his first trip to the aquarium.  He can barely stay in his seat!

Tanner wanting to swim with the fishes.  (Sting ray, actually.) 

Tanner enjoying his first taste of spaghetti.  (He cried when he was presented with his yellow cake / chocolate icing birthday cake - I guess the icing was too gooey and messy!)  No matter...the more for the rest of us.  He doesn't know what he's missing yet.   

Tanner showing Bryan a big leopard at the zoo.  

We were all mesmerized by this beautiful show of feathers.  

Here's our granite for the bathroom vanities.  Matt really wanted something orange, lighter in overall color with a lot of movement.  I didn't want orange...but we found this one and both liked it.  This'll go on top of two different colors of cherry wood vanities.   

That's the update for now.    

More later.  

L

Bad Things Happen in Threes, Right?

Greetings from my bedside table. I can't sleep.  It's hot and humid in my room, my husband is in another state visiting his Dad who was bucked off his horse on Sunday and broke his neck; our house flooded on Tuesday and now all three levels are missing various flooring, ceiling, drywall, etc.;  and at 2:20AM this morning, my dog Axle had seizure number two.  

I can guess at the cause, since the last time he had a seizure was just under a month ago and the animal hospital couldn't find anything wrong with our boy that was very obvious.

I am hoping this ends the string of unfortunate events for our family, but am beginning to prepare myself for more despite the saying that "bad things happen in threes."

I hope it doesn't sound like I'm complaining - it's just that these circumstances are so incredible that I feel the need to share them with you.  

I have yet to give a full account of what's happening at the house and demolition, but here's some fun pictures to illustrate:  

Restoration crew member ripping up our kitchen floor-

View of kitchen floors being dried out - that's a very attractive linoleum that was hidden under our Pergo!

Where the kitchen dining area light fixture was (much of the water collected and funneled out through the fixture onto our kitchen table and the floor).

You can see how wet the drywall was!

It's hard to see from this angle, but the crew had to remove a lot of the ceiling to get rid of all the contaminated moisture.

  

Pray for Tom

Good evening. 

For all of you who read this, I could really use your prayers tonight. 

Matt's Dad was in an accident with his horse today.  He was bucked off and the fall broke his neck.  

Thankfully, he is not paralyzed.  But further testing is needed tonight to determine how extensive the damage is and what needs to be done to repair it.  

Tom was in front of the house when the horse threw him off.  Natalie was home and heard their dog barking more urgently than normal.  

He was very lucky that he was not out on the Ranch alone when this happened, but like most Brenkle men, he is made of some pretty stern stuff.  I believe he could have probably marched himself to the hospital if he had to. 

I will keep you all posted on what is happening, but for now, just keep him in your prayers.  

Thank you! 

Lauren   

Playing in the Snow

We woke up this morning, put on our snow gear and trekked out into the park by our house.  

We had so much FUN!

The snow was pretty deep - up to Axle's chest in some parts of the park.  

He was running as fast as he could, rolling in the snow, plowing through it, throwing it up in the air and catching it in his mouth.  So funny.  He's never been in snow this deep before.    

It hasn't snowed very much this year, and it FINALLY really came down yesterday.    

Me and Axle having fun:

Axle and Matt playing in the snow:

He looks so cute in his puppy pack!

Matt and Axle running in the park.

When we got home, we shook out the pine tree on ourselves with Axle close by.  I wish I had a picture of that with all of our lashes white with snow and the dog looking a little bewildered.  What a great start to our day!    

Puppy Has a Seizure

I am still flustered.  

My puppy, Axle, had a seizure today.  

It was the first one I've ever seen a dog have.  

When I realized something was wrong, I thought he was just scratching his belly, but the tags on his collar were jingling too much.  I called his name.  He didn't respond.  I went over to him.  

His legs were sticking out and rigid.  He was on his bed, his mouth was open, he was gasping for breath, his head was under the couch and he had peed all over the place.  I moved him out into the open so he wouldn't hurt himself under the couch.  

We rushed him to the Animal Hospital.  We had blood work done - and the results showed no abnormalities in the blood or his urine.  Everything was normal, which indicates an exterior cause or no real "cause" at all.  Apparently, that happens a lot more often than not.  

We need to watch him now and keep a "Puppy Journal," to make sure we track EVERYTHING that happened today with the dog in case it happens again.  That way, they might be able to deduce a possible cause from any common factors.          

It was really scary and I hope it never happens again.  

But we'll be watching him extra close for a while.  He's at my feet right now.  I think the smell of his bed/ the area where his bed has some bad memories.    

I'm still pretty shaken up...and Matt is too.  

Even our cat Ty, seems to be acting a little more vigilant around the dog.  

Valentine's Day Change of Plans

This year for Valentine's Day, Matt and I decided to stay in. 

It was actually really nice.  

We had planned to make dinner and get dressed up and have an in-house dance party with ourselves. 

We went to the store to buy some steaks and other things for our "romantico" dinner. 

On our way to the store, I saw an old little Cocker Spaniel walking around in the snow by himself.  Hours later, when Matt was walking Axle, he saw the Spaniel again, but this time, he was with a large (overfed) tank of a black lab with a purple harness on.  He couldn't find the owners anywhere near where the dogs were, so he decided to bring them home so we could see if there was any way to find the owners or possibly take them to a vet and see if they had been microchipped.  

When we brought the dogs home, Axle didn't like that there were two dogs in his backyard that he couldn't play with.  The Spaniel was so small and old (and going blind) that we couldn't risk putting our energetic one year old with him.  After looking over the little one, we discovered that the dog wasn't really in great shape, he didn't have a collar, tufts of hair were matted and coming out and we began to wonder if the little dog was homeless.

The black lab had tags linking her to a vet in Golden, but they were already closed for the day.

I was amazed at how quickly the two dogs had bonded to each other.  They were so very different (in size and personality), but already seemed to be great friends.  

So we fed and watered the dogs and called around to see who was open and who could help us.  When we tried to track the rabies tag on the black lab, no one could pull up any records - so that was a dead end.  We eventually found a vet that could help us scan the dogs (and seemed willing enough to help).  The only catch was, if we couldn't find a microchip or the owners, the dogs would be taken to the pound by Jeffco, (which would most likely be a death sentence).  

Matt and I had decided ahead of time that we would let the dogs stay with us until the owners were found.  But we were worried that we wouldn't find the owner of the Spaniel.  We took the dogs into the vet and the black lab had a chip!  We were so glad.  At least one of the dogs would get home.     

Not only that, but when the vet tech inquired further, she discovered that the two dogs belonged to the same owner!  No wonder the two seemed so comfortable together!  Upon hearing they would both being going home, I, true to form, got a little misty-eyed.  I was so relieved! 

After waiting for about forty five minutes, the owners came to pick up the dogs.  Apparently, they had been moving and the men of the house didn't realize the dogs were in the house (um, yeah, it was cold outside).  So the little Houdinis escaped.  I don't think the owners even realized the dogs were gone until we called to tell them we had their dogs.    

It was wonderful to see the dogs reunited with their people!    

Matt apologized for "ruining" Valentine's Day.  I was surprised.  This little adventure was perfect.  We were spending time together and I was being reminded of some of the reasons I fell in love with him.  Matt is so willing to go out of his way to help others.  He is so kind and generous and has a gentle, compassionate spirit. 

I am so lucky to have him!